Perfection

“When things are perfect, that’s when you need to worry most.”

~ Drew Barrymore

It’s been a couple of rough days.  I seriously considered leaving my job, my job that I’ve known for about half of my life!  All because of this preconception of perfection that my brain must accomplish.  The very next day I was in a car accident that I am pretty sure totaled my car!

But one thing at a time!  Perfection!  I had to be reminded that this cruel concept of perfection is what throws me into panic mode.  It makes me overwhelmed which tailspins me into feeling like a complete failure.  I had to be reminded that in order to reverse this nasty line of events is to write…write…and write some more.  Write what is in my heart, write what is worrying me, just write.  List the things that are overwhelming me, the things that I feel I am failing at.  And one by one I can start crossing them off as I complete them in order of importance.

Then most importantly, I think, I had to be reminded that the list never ends.  I just keep adding and crossing off.  But perfection is something that will never be reached, not by me or anyone.  And it’s okay.  There is no reason to panic, just take one step at a time.  And believe me there is nothing like a serious car accident to slap you right back into reality to make you realize what is most important.  The things that made me panic before will always be on the list, they just won’t be at the top.

7/25/2010

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